ABOUT ME
Hi, I’m Mary Ellen
I work with high-functioning professionals who are doing well in most areas of life, but feel stuck in a drinking pattern they can't seem to change.
From the outside, my life looked perfectly together. But inside? I had this nightly wine habit that bothered me.
Most evenings, I'd pour a glass (or two...or three) almost without thinking about it. What started as a way to unwind had quietly become the way I ended every day.
And if you're reading this, you might recognize some of this pattern in your own life.
It wasn't dramatic. It was just... stuck.
And now I help people get unstuck.
The Pattern I Couldn't Break
Here's what it looked like:
I'd go to bed thinking,
Tomorrow I'm only having one glass.
Or maybe I just won't drink at all.
Then 6pm would roll around and… the urge would win.
It wasn't that I couldn't stop.
I could.
I could—even white-knuckle it for a few days or even weeks.
But it took so much mental energy that it wasn't sustainable.
And eventually, I'd be right back where I started.
What I started noticing:
Lower energy than I wanted
More anxiety than seemed normal
Sleep that wasn't actually restoring me
Thinking about drinking more than I wanted to
A nagging disappointment in myself
The sense that I should be able to just have one or skip a night—but I wasn't
The habit had become so automatic that skipping it felt strange and uncomfortable.
And honestly, it wasn't just about stress.
It was the ritual.
This was how I ended my day, everyday.
I just wanted it to stop feeling like such a big deal.
Eventually I realized the problem wasn't a lack of discipline.
I just hadn't learned the skills that actually change habits.
What Actually Worked
What finally changed things wasn't more willpower.
It was learning a few key skills that changed how my brain responded to alcohol.
Instead of constantly trying to control the habit, I started understanding how the habit worked.
Understanding why the habit formed
Learning how the brain’s reward system reinforces patterns changed everything.
I realized my brain wasn't broken or lacking discipline.
It had simply learned a strong drinking pattern.
This wasn't a character flaw.
It was neuroscience.
Handling stress without alcohol
For years I had used wine to take the edge off difficult days.
But I had never actually learned how to process stress or uncomfortable emotions in a healthier way.
Developing those skills made a huge difference.
Interrupting the craving cycle
Instead of fighting urges, I learned how to recognize and question the thought patterns behind them.
Many of the beliefs that once made drinking feel necessary simply stopped making sense.
And when those thoughts shifted, the cravings started losing their power.
Feeling confident drinking differently
I also learned how to navigate social situations where I wanted to drink differently.
Not by forcing myself to abstain — but by feeling genuinely comfortable choosing differently when I wanted to.
These are all skills that can be learned. As I got better at them, I wasn't fighting myself anymore. The habit just...lessened.
It's not that you're incapable of change. It's that you've never been taught how to change. There is a difference.
Where I Am Now
I still drink occasionally, but it's completely different.
It's no longer my default - it's just an option I can totally take or leave.
I have zero cravings for that nightly drink. I can go out with friends or attend events and not drink, and it's genuinely no big deal.
When I do choose to have a drink, it's a conscious choice, not an automatic reach for the wine bottle at 6pm.
The difference is freedom. I'm not managing urges or battling with myself. Alcohol has become a small, optional thing instead of the main character in my evening routine.
This Might Be For You If…
You don’t have to hit rock bottom or have a label to want something different.
You’ve tried to “cut back” many times before
But it slowly drifts back to the same place.
You wouldn’t call yourself addicted
But you don’t like how much mental space alcohol takes up.
Drinking has started to feel harder than it should
Rules, guilt, and constant negotiation with yourself.
Whether you drink every day or not, the pattern feels familiar
It often becomes more than you wanted it to.
You feel stuck between two opposing worlds
Not wanting to quit forever — but not happy where things are.
You want your evenings (and mornings) back
More calm, more energy, and less internal debate.
If you’ve been quietly wondering whether drinking could feel different, you’re not alone.
You don’t need to wait until things get worse to want something better.
How I Help Clients
I work with high-functioning people who are exactly where I was—doing well in most areas of life but stuck in a drinking pattern that no longer works.
We focus on:
Understanding your brain's patterns (not fighting them)
Questioning the thoughts that create cravings
Building emotional regulation skills
Navigating social situations with confidence
The goal isn't just to drink less—it's to reach a place where alcohol stops being a big deal.
What It’s Like to Work Together
Our coaching sessions are thoughtful, practical, and completely judgment-free.
This isn’t about willpower or strict rules. It’s about getting curious about the patterns that keep the habit in place and learning how to change them in a way that actually works in real life.
Clients often tell me that one of the biggest shifts is simply understanding why their brain developed the habit in the first place. From there, we start experimenting with new ways of responding to urges, stress, and social situations.
Progress doesn’t come from forcing yourself to be perfect. It comes from building skills, awareness, and confidence over time.
Most people start noticing meaningful shifts in how they think about alcohol within the first few weeks.
What Clients Say
Take the next stepDrinking Doesn't Have to Take Up So Much Space
If you're tired of the automatic pour without even deciding, waking up feeling “meh”…
and and making promises to yourself about “just one” that don’t stick — let's talk.
What Happens on the Free Consultation
This is a relaxed conversation where we’ll:
• talk about what’s currently happening with your drinking
• look at what you’ve already tried
• explore what might actually move the needle for you
You’ll leave the call with clarity about your next steps—whether we decide to work together or not.
It’s not about more willpower.
It’s learning a different way to approach drinking.